Staying cool in the 30s: 4 Tips

When the mercury hits the 30s, some of us can start to sweat.

The same can be said of ageing. When we move out of our 20s, and perceive the way we are living as not matching the way we thought we would be living, or how we think we should be living, it is easy to feel hot under the collar.

Next month I am 33. I have good health, a great job, comfortable living environment, positive friends and family. I have travelled all around the world and done many amazing things. However, there are times I feel something is missing.

The one thing I haven’t cracked yet is enduring love. Despite several colourful relationships with interesting people, I have never been married, had children nor settled down for longer than three years - even then that was spread out across several countries across the globe (my ex is Australian). I always made other choices to do other things, which served me well in my 20s.

But now, after years of itchy feet, I suddenly just want to stop, sit down and settle.

The 30s are the new 20s. People getting married and having babies. This is wonderful and brings a lot of vicarious joy, but suddenly makes me ask myself: ‘what do I want?’.

I was recently diagnosed with Poly Cystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS), a condition which can cause infertility. Treatment is available, and my sister who also has the condition did (eventually) conceive with assistance. But the likelihood of conceiving lowers with each year and even each month.

I have to suddenly change my thinking from the world is my oyster, to time is of the essence.

So, how to stay cool:

1. Recognise that YOU are right where YOU are meant to be

There is not one set way to live life. The possibilities are endless. It is easy to compare to others. Every other post on social media is people in relationships, getting married and having babies. Start to recognise the amazing things you have done in your life, whether small such as chatting to a random person on a bus, to large, such as travelling to a country you always wanted to go to.

2. Things take TIME

Rome wasn’t built in a day. Neither was your life. Have a pint of Guinness and ponder ‘good things come to those who wait’.

3. Make PLANS

Waiting doesn’t mean inactivity. Once you can answer the question: what do I truly want in life, you can start putting ideas in to motion, getting information, time frames, finances and become mentally, emotionally and spirituality ready to take the next step, so that when the time is right, so are you.

4. Remember everything works out as it should, at the RIGHT time.

Use hindsight to help you see when plans came together in the past, often in unexpected, sudden but amazing ways.

Don't they say 'life begins at 40'.... :-)